It can be hard when you are struggling but the great thing is that the pain that you are facing can help you to be motivated to make changes that you need in your life. Most people don’t just wake up one day and decide that they are going to change for no reasons. It seems like the only thing that can make a person want to change is when they are going through some kind of suffering.
You might not need to make a huge change in order to make your life better but even a small change can help things to move along. You might desire to have a better relationship, to lose weight or even to love yourself more. Some people will feel motivation to change but they first have to figure out what they were doing before in order to make the future better.
Since change is so hard, most people don’t embrace it. Real change can be hard and this means that people often stop it before it gets complete. Even though change can be exciting, it takes a lot of work to make it happen. The great thing though is that when you are in some kind of pain, most of the time, people will change so that they can work through the pain. Change can be stressful but it can be a new light for your life.
Stop Looking at the Pain Negatively
Most people look at pain negatively but as you push away the pain that you are feeling, you will sometimes see that this just brings more pain. Do you drink or do drugs to hide or mask the pain that you are facing? Drinking or drugging to forget things will only end up causing you more pain later in life. Are you someone that overeats when they are feeling emotions they don’t like? This will end up causing you more pain with weight gain and physical problems.
When you distract the pain by busying your life, you might hide the pain to the point where you become overwhelmed or overly emotional. You might try to talk yourself into believing that you shouldn’t have to embrace the pain or look at it or that you can hide it away but the truth is that you will never fix yourself if you hide or mask the pain.
What if the pain that you are facing has something important to show you?
Be Mindful
You need to learn to be mindful about change. The first way to start changing is to let the pain be felt. When you are mindful of what you are feeling, it can be uncomfortable but that is okay. You will see that as soon as you notice the pain and accept that it is happening without trying to hide it that you will be able to make changes to live a better life.
Embracing the Pain
The next step after being mindful is to embrace or accept the pain. This can mean that you are recognizing that it is there and doesn’t mean that you are giving into it. Giving into the pain can mean that you are stuck with it and that you are not in control but embracing or accepting the pain tells you that you are hurting but that you can live your life better to deal with it.
Integrating the Pain
The next step is harder and this is when you decide to accept all parts of who you are. This means that even in your flaws and shortcomings that you embrace who you are, all parts. You cannot reject parts of yourself that you don’t like.
Some people will hide who they are because they don’t want others to see the real them but as soon as you decide to take all parts of yourself as important, you can deal with the hard things inside.
Make Yourself Feel Better
You can make yourself feel better by loving yourself more. If you have felt ashamed in the past or if you have had feelings that made you feel that you weren’t good enough, chances are that you lived a lot of your life sad or angry. You might feel bad or feel that you aren’t good enough. You might be someone that seeks out someone to give you unconditional love.
Instead of looking for someone to love you unconditionally, you need to look at the parts of you that are in pain. Be mindful and accepting of the pain and allow yourself to feel your feelings. If you have trauma from childhood, embrace this and get the therapy that you need to cope and to accept what happened to you.
Once you really know who you are and what you are all about, you can make changes to better yourself. Even though you have been hurt or you have things in the past that sometimes hold you back, learn to make yourself better and learn to feel good about who you are. What could be better in life than living the best that you can live?