Have you been dumped, and you have read so many articles on getting over love that your head hurts? There is so much advice out there on how to get over a breakup and the lists can be endless.
You can see that people looking for these articles can get lost in the amount of time they would have to spend reading this and they can take all day to figure it out, just to hear it over and over again. You will read to take care of who you are and learn to reconnect with people that you have lost touch with.
All these things seem like they are great, but they do not seem to fix the issue but just make you feel better for the moment.
When your heart is broken and you want it to stop hurting, doing all of these things will not fix you but just put a temporary fix on things.
Before you are told to get back out on the dating scene, you have to look at the other things in your life. You have to be able to tell others your story about your past relationship so that you can move on. Time will show you that you can heal because pain will be there no matter what and you have to work through it.
Getting over heartbreak does not happen right away and it is a process that you have to work through. You must learn to be patient and kind with yourself. This is hard to hear but it is true and the only way that you will heal is by going through the pain.
Learn to let pain go and learn to let yourself heal. Here are some things that you can do to work through your pain:
- Give yourself time.
- Show yourself love.
- Be kind to others.
- Be realistic.
- Learn to understand what you are going through.
- Forgive yourself for things you did wrong.
- Know what went wrong in the relationship.
- Talk to your family and friends about things that happened.
- Know that tomorrow will be better, even just a little bit.
- Learn to accept that the relationship is over.
- Figure out what you can do to make things better in your own life before you move on to the dating scene again.
- Have time to grieve.
- Have time to be angry.
- Do not hide your feelings.
Relationships are hard and they are meaningful. Even though you are going through a rough patch and getting over heartbreak it does not mean that your identity has changed or that you have to have someone to survive. Learn to be who you are and when you meet someone else, start over with someone special.
When you lose a relationship that is important to you in your life, learn to figure out what happened and learn to keep yourself strong and keep a hold of who you are. You are connected to who you are and to people around you. Have a meaning and a perception of everything you do, everyone you meet and who you are.
When you feel lonely, learn to know that you are identifying your feelings with what went wrong. Do not put a void in your life and wonder what point your life has. You need to get out of this thinking and figure out how to get your old life over.
Your part of this story is over and now you have to start rebuilding your life.
Getting Over it
Go around people that love you and that want to see you get better. Ask them for advice and ask them to help you feel yourself out and figure out who you are outside of your relationship.
Connect with new people that love you and give meaning to your life. Restore the meaning with people that you lost connection with and learn to be your old self.
See it for What it Was
Learn to see the relationship for what it was. Do not see it as perfect because nothing is. You are not perfect for anyone; you are just a part of another person’s story. Learn to stop being a victim and to know who you are.
The truth is that memories are hard to get over and no matter what part of the story you are telling, tell the bad parts just like telling the good parts.
Look at things objectively and know why your relationship ended. Was there a lot of drama and fights? Figure out why your love ended.
The relationship didn’t end because you did something wrong, it ended because you are not right for each other.
Relationship with You
Learn to love who you are and to figure out who you are. Take time off to figure out what you are attracted to, what your goals are and what you want in your life.
You were probably so entranced by your relationship that you forgot who you were. Figure out who you are and what you want in your life and your relationships will get better.
What You Need
Learn what you need and what cause conflict in your relationship. This happens when your needs aren’t getting met. Figure out what you need and what the problems were with your relationship. Your emotional needs are probably:
- Feeling important.
- Learning to connect with your partner through values and feelings.
- Feeling safe and secure.
We all want this in our relationship, and we put some things in priority to others. Learn to figure out what you find most important in relationships.
Learn what went wrong and how to identify things in the future.
If you are trying to figure out what went wrong and what relationships are about, take time to do this and dive deep into your emotions.